by Jeb Blount, Author of People Buy You: The Real Secret to What Matters Most in Business

How important are the first impressions you make with potential customers to success in sales?  

Recently a good friend told me a story about an experience she had while shopping for a mattress. Now this wasn’t just any mattress, this was a high end mattress that cost a couple of thousand dollars. Prior to hitting the stores she had done extensive research on the internet and had narrowed her focus to a few brands and styles. She found exactly what she was looking for at the first furniture store she visited and the price was right. But she didn’t make the purchase.

Instead she drove all the way across town to visit another furniture store where she met sales representative, Gwen. There she purchased the same mattress she had seen at the other store. When I pressed her she admitted (while trying not to look at her husband) that she paid more at the second store than the first. 

“Why would you do that?” I asked.

She responded, “The guy at the first store, I think his name was Ray, just didn’t impress me. I mean from the first moment there was just something about him I didn’t like. So even though he had the mattress I wanted I decided to shop around some more. But Gwen was different. Even though we had just met I could tell she cared about me. She made me feel good.”

The first rep, Ray, is the poster child for the saying, “You never get a second chance to make a first impression.” We all make instant judgments when we first meet people. Those judgments, which are both imperfect and emotional, have a lasting impact on how we view and interact with others. And in Michelle’s case first impressions caused her to make the illogical decision to pay more for the same product because she liked Gwen more than she liked Ray.

In business customers and prospects make these same imperfect judgments each time they engage with new salespeople, customer service reps, and frankly anyone else they encounter.  

If you want to know how important first impressions are, just ask Ray. Sales Managers in high end retail like furniture and auto sales will even tell you that the initial greeting is the most important part of the sale. 

Making a great first impression is all about being likeable. If your prospect likes you they will be open to answering your questions and engaging in a conversation about their needs and situation. How long does it take to make a first impression? An instant! Unlike trust, which is earned over time through multiple interactions, being likeable or unlikeable occurs in mere moments. So when first meeting new people it is absolutely critical that you control those things that you can control.

The word Likable is defined by the Marriam-Webster Dictionary as, having qualities that bring about a favorable regard. We all, to some extent, have qualities and characteristics that make us naturally likeable to certain types of people and personalities. While at the same time we possess qualities make us naturally unlikeable to others.

The problem we face in sales and business though is we don’t always get to choose the people we interact with. Many of the people we encounter will not be naturally attracted to us. Complicating things more are the preconceived perceptions that all people bring into relationships. These perceptions which include but are not limited to cultural, racial, and socio-economic biases are also beyond our control.

There are however important and critical actions we can take that will positively impact first impressions and likability. These actions are completely within our control and executed properly help us both neutralize biases outside of our control and attract people who might not otherwise find us naturally likable.

Five People Buy You Tips for Make Great First Impressions

Smile. A pleasant, sincere smile is the best way to make a great first impression. Humans are naturally attracted to other humans who are smiling. So be aware of your facial expression and put a smile on your face.

Be Polite. I saw a bumper sticker once that said, “Mean People Suck.” People who are rude, impolite and discourteous are unlikable. Unless you were raised in a barn by animals someone taught you basic manners. In all interactions with prospects and customers put those manners to work. People will notice.

Stay Focused. It today’s demanding work environment it is easy to become distracted. The late Jim Rohn always said, “Where ever you are, be there.” This is essential advice when it comes to first impressions. You must develop the self-discipline to shut everything else out and remain completely focused on the other person.

Be Enthusiastic. Enthusiasm for your product, service and company sells. Enthusiasm is transferable and infectious. Your enthusiasm is driven by your attitude and beliefs so it is critical to work consistently to build and retain a winning attitude. One note though, there are few things more off-putting than insincere enthusiasm so be careful not to get carried away.

Be Confident. Weak people repel. Arrogant people are turnoffs. Confident people attract. Confidence is driven by your self-image, product knowledge, attitude, the way you dress, your health, and even your spirituality. Your level of confidence is a direct reflection of your willingness and self-discipline to invest in yourself.  

The good news is making a first impression in business actually very easy if you focus completely on what is within your control. And though you never get a second chance to make a first impression, you only have to make a good first impression once to lay a solid foundation on which to build a profitable relationship with your customer.

Jeb Blount is the CEO of SalesGravy.com, the world’s largest sales career website. A respected thought leader on sales and sales leadership, he is author of three books, People Buy You: The Real Secret to what Matters Most in Business, Sales Guy’s 7 Rules for Outselling the Recession, and Power Principles. He is the author of more than 100 articles on sales and sales leadership and the host of the top rated Sales Guy Podcast. When you buy Jeb’s new book, People Buy You, today, you’ll also receive thousands of dollars worth of bonus gifts from sales growth leaders – learn more at www.PeopleBuyYou.com.

 By Jeb Blount, Author of People Buy You: The Real Secret to What Matters Most in Business

All of my friends and many of my colleagues know that I hate voice mail. I love email, text messaging, and even smoke signals but I despise voice mail more than any other communication tool. Why?

I’m a pretty busy executive and I usually spend most of my day talking to other people on the phone. On most days it seems as if my phone never stops ringing. There is just no way to get to every call. Many calls go straight to voice mail.  In fact, I average in the neighborhood of 20 voice mail messages every working day.

Right now you may be thinking to yourself, “that sounds like a good problem to have Jeb”, and in some cases you would be right. Some of these calls are from customers and clients who want to buy more from me. Trust me, when someone is calling me to do business I’m happy.

But, the vast majority of the calls are from people who want me to do something for them. They want me to buy something, form a partnership, give them an opinion, introduce them to someone, or answer a coaching question. But this is not why I hate voice mail.

I hate voice mail because every day I have to stop what I’m doing, dial my inbox and listen to all of those messages one at a time. It is a slow and time consuming process that sometimes takes up to thirty minutes. Which is usually time I don’t have. And of course, the catch with voice mail is that it is linear; meaning that you have to start at the beginning and listen to each message until you reach the end. You can’t look at all of your messages, like you can on email, and then determine which ones are a higher priority than others and which ones are just junk.

This is where the pain comes in and my hatred of voice mail begins. As I reluctantly trudge through my messages there are three kinds that really drive me crazy.

The first is when people don’t leave their names and phone numbers. I get a message but I either don’t know who you are or how to reach you. These messages are automatically deleted. 

Then there are the people who leave long-winded messages. There are occasions when I’m ok with this like when the long message gives me all of the information I need and I don’t have to call back. But if the message requires me to call you back, which is almost always the case, I just get irritated. Most of these messages are saved for when I have time. Of course the brutal reality is . .  I never have time.

Finally, there are the people who garble or say their name or phone number too fast. I hate these messages the most because I’m required to listen to the message more than once which wastes my time and makes it more likely, if I am busy or in a hurry, that I will just delete the message.

So why, other than getting all of this off of my chest, is this long rant important to you? Because, as a sales and business professionals, the telephone is still your most important business tool. Every day business professionals all over the world make millions of calls to current and prospective customers, colleagues, and potential employers. Most of those calls go straight to the voice mail boxes of people, who like me, hate voice mail. This is why so many of your messages go un-returned.

The key is to come to grips with the fact that on some level most of your buyers despise voice mail and either ignore or delete most of their messages. It is wishful or, more likely, delusional thinking to expect your voice mail messages to actually be returned. However, with a few simple adjustments, that make your messages easier for your prospects to deal with, you may succeed in getting many more messages returned and at the same time earn the respect of the people you call.

Three People Buy You Tips for Winning Voice Mail Messages

Give Contact Information First: 99% of the time when we leave a voice mail we want the other person to call us back. When you give your contact information first you are far more likely to entice the person you called into writing down your name and number for a call back. Besides, it is just good business. Try something like this: “Hi this is Jeb Blount, from SalesGravy.com. My phone number is 555-222-1212.” This demonstrates your respect for the other person’s time and your professionalism.

Keep It Short: Your messages should be thirty seconds or less and deal with only one subject. When you hold yourself to thirty seconds if forces you to be succinct and to focus on the most important information. Always remember say why you have called. There is nothing more irritating to a buyer than a salesperson who is less than honest about their intentions. After you give your personal information just say, “The reason for my call is” or “the Purpose of my call is”, then tell them why you are calling and leave your message.

Repeat Your Name and Phone Number: Before you push # always say your name again slowly and clearly and always, always say your number twice. It should sound something like this, “again, this is Jeb Blount with QuickandDirtyTips.com my phone number is 555-222-1212 that’s 555-222-1212.” This will ensure that your name and phone number are registered correctly and that you leave your prospect with a positive impression of you.

Jeb Blount is the CEO of SalesGravy.com, the world’s largest sales career website. A respected thought leader on sales and sales leadership, he is author of three books, People Buy You: The Real Secret to what Matters Most in Business, Sales Guy’s 7 Rules for Outselling the Recession, and Power Principles. He is the author of more than 100 articles on sales and sales leadership and the host of the top rated Sales Guy Podcast. When you buy Jeb’s new book, People Buy You, today, you’ll also receive thousands of dollars worth of bonus gifts from sales growth leaders – learn more at www.PeopleBuyYou.com.

By Jeb Blount, Author of the #1 bestseller People Buy You: The Real Secret to What Matters Most In Business

Sales expert and bestselling author Jeffrey Gitomer teaches a simple philosophy, “People love to buy but they hate to be sold.” In other words, most people prefer to buy on their terms. They do not want or appreciate a hard pitch or a features dump.

Most of us, at one time or another, have heard some wise trainer, manager or mentor say:

“You have to sell yourself.”

“If you want to get that job, son, you have to sell yourself.”

“The real key to sales is your ability to sell yourself.”

“If you want others to like you, you’ll have to sell yourself.”

This philosophy is prevalent in our business culture. Recently I was at an Ivy League University for a speech by a successful businessman to a group of MBA students from the top business schools in the world. The speaker was so well respected that when he walked into the room there was a hush. The audience members were on the edge of their seats in anticipation. And what was the message? What was the secret of success that this revered businessman offered? “Never forget how important it is in business to first sell yourself.” The entire audience nodded in unison. 

For this wise man and many others, the phrase sell yourself has become an easy-to-use cliché. It just rolls off the tongue. Like the audience at the speech I attended, most people will nod their heads in agreement to the statement as if some prophet on a hill had just read it from stone tablets. Then, they go forth into the world and start selling at networking events, to clients, prospects, hiring managers, and anyone else they can get to stand still for more than five minutes. You’ve heard it. These are the people who tell you all about themselves, their accomplishments, and how great they are. These are often the same people who sell to their customers by dumping data, pushing their position, or simply trying to talk their way into a sale.

But it does not work, because people like to buy – they don’t like to be sold. In fact, the harder you try to sell yourself to others the more you push them away. A conversation where the other person tells you all about how great they are is a turnoff. It is a features dump. You don’t walk away from that conversation thinking how much you would like to spend more time with them. Instead you think, “What a jerk,” or “How boring,” or “Wow, that guy is full of himself.”

Of course, we do love the opportunity to sell ourselves. Most of us, if given the opportunity, will talk for hours about our favorite person, oblivious to the negative impact it has on how we are viewed by others.

If you want to become a master persuader forget about selling yourself to others.  Instead, help ithers buy others buy you on their terms.  People Buy You for their reasons, not for your reasons. So when we sell people on why they should like us, it backfires. However, when they choose to buy you for their reasons, it creates a powerful connection and a relationship that makes almost anything possible.

Five People Buy You Levers of Master Persuaders

1. Be Likable: Likability is the gateway to connections and ultimately to relationships. If others don’t find you likable, then it is virtually impossible to form profitable business relationships. If you are not likable, people will not buy you or from you. Likability is responsible for first impressions because it happens in an instant, and it is responsible for ongoing impressions because it can be lost in an instant. When people find you likable, the door opens to emotional connections, to trust, and ultimately to business relationships that help you build a successful career and income.

Smile and use your positive attitude and optimism to project a cheerful, smiling, outgoing personality. People love to be around happy, optimistic people.

2. Connect: The key to connecting is listening deeply with your eyes and ears. Listen to what your customers say and observe their emotions. There are things they are passionate about. Look for common ground here. When you truly connect with someone, you take rapport to the next level. You begin to move from a business relationship to a friendship. Connecting tears down walls that tend to get in the way of real communication and understanding. When people feel connected with you they feel more comfortable telling you their real problems. With this information in hand, you have the opportunity to solve problems that really matter. This ability provides real value and engenders true loyalty. Strong connections are hard to break and are the foundation of truly prosperous, long-term business relationships.

3. Solve Problems:  Problem solvers are the champions of the business world. However, it is impossible to solve problems you do not know about, which is why connecting is so critical. The essence of business is one person solving another person’s problem. A solved problem is the value that buyers pay for. It is the most important lever in the People Buy You philosophy. The most successful business people take problem solving to the next level. These individuals are constantly on the lookout for problems they can solve-even if it has no direct impact on their business. They live by the motto, “By helping others get what they want, I will get what I want.”

4. Build Trust: Trust is the glue that holds relationships together and the foundation on which all long-term relationships rest. Trust is developed with tangible evidence that you do what you say you will do, that you keep promises, and that you maintain a consistent commitment to excellence. It means going the extra mile in everything you do. In a world in which most people are doing just enough to get by, those business professionals who consistently do more than they have to will stand out. Buyers appreciate and reward this commitment to excellence with repeat business, referrals, and ultimately with trust.

5. Create Positive Emotional Experiences: Learn to make dealing with you fun, relaxing, and rewarding. You always want to leave your customers and prospects thinking about you and remembering you positively so it is imperative that you find ways to create positive emotional experiences for your customers. The key is to focus on the little things. Remember birthdays, send handwritten notes, do the unexpected. Just as an anchor is used to hold a ship in place against currents, wind, tide, and storm, positive emotional experiences anchor your relationships. Master persuaders always leave people wanting more of you.  

Jeb Blount is the CEO of SalesGravy.com, the most visited sales website on the internet. A respected thought leader on sales and sales leadership, he is author of three books, People Buy You: The Real Secret to what Matters Most in Business, Sales Guy’s 7 Rules for Outselling the Recession, and Power Principles. He is the author of more than 100 articles on sales and sales leadership and the host of the top rated Sales Guy Podcast. When you buy Jeb’s new book, People Buy You, today, you’ll also receive thousands of dollars worth of bonus gifts from sales growth leaders – learn more at www.PeopleBuyYou.com.

By Jeb Blount, Author of the #1 bestseller, People Buy You: The Real Secret to What Matters Most in Business

A question often asked by Salespeople is “How Do I Build Better Rapport?”

Rapport is a popular and ubiquitous concept in sales.  A module on rapport is included in virtually every sales and leadership training course. You’ll find chapters on rapport in almost every sales book. Many thousands of books and seminars are dedicated exclusively to the concept of rapport. A search on Google for how to build rapport yields a million or so returns. Despite all of this, rapport is among the most misunderstood and misapplied concepts in business. Ask 10 salespeople to explain rapport and you’ll get 10 different answers. Few people really understand the concept of rapport.

Rapport is essentially being in sync with another person to the extent that you are able to influence their behavior. The rapport building process is designed to develop common ground with another person through mirroring and matching body language, voice tone and speed, word patterns, eye movement, and even breathing. In time, according to the experts, when you truly have rapport with another, you have the ability to lead them and change their behavior patterns.  

The problem with rapport is that it is just too hard and complex to get into sync with someone enough to influence their behaviors.  Few sales professionals have the time or inclination to become experts in deciphering word patterns, eye movements, and facial expressions. Learning to effectively and discretely mirror and match people based on their communication style—audio, visual or kinesthetic— sounds really cool in a seminar, but it rarely succeeds consistently in real world business situations with real people. This results in rapport building being awkward, cheesy, and manipulative. Making matters worse are the legions of salespeople who mistake small talk at the beginning of a sales call as rapport building. Taking their cue from misinformed sales trainers, they’ll make dumb comments about some random object in their prospect’s office as if that is enough to initiate a relationship. Far too many sales people just go through the motions to check Build Rapport off their sales-process list so they can get down to selling.

Buyers are not fooled. They find these lame attempts at rapport building gratuitous and insincere. Over time, they become numb to rapport- building efforts.  If you want people to buy you, forget about rapport. Remove the word from your vocabulary. Instead, focus on connecting.

Rapport is designed, not to develop trusting relationships, but rather to influence behavior. Rapport in its purest form is manipulative. People who feel manipulated will be distrustful of your motivations, no matter how pure, and will never feel connected to you. Connecting, on the other hand, is designed to win others over through a focus on their needs. The most effective strategy for winning others over (convincing them that you are their friend) is to start and end by helping them get what they want.

Stop Trying to Build Rapport and Learn How Listen

The most insatiable human desire, our deepest craving is the desire to feel valued, appreciated, and important. The key to connecting and winning others over is, therefore, extremely simple: make them feel important. The real secret to making others feel important is something you have at your disposal right now. It’s listening. Listening is powerful.  The more you listen, the more connected others will feel to you. When you listen, you make people feel important, respected, and heard.

Unfortunately, most salespeople would rather talk than listen.  Why? Because we would rather think about and talk about ourselves, our products and services, our accomplishments, and our problems.   The vast majority of people, especially salespeople, never make the effort to sincerely listen to others.  Much of the time when they are not talking they are thinking about what they are going to say next.  

There is real power in listening and using it to your advantage to build connections. The desire to feel important, valued, and appreciated is more insatiable than any other human craving. Just like you, when people talk about themselves and someone listens, it makes them feel important and subsequently draws them to you. Although truly listening to another person requires self-discipline, selflessness, practice, and patience, it is not complicated or complex. That is the beauty of connecting. Unlike the complexity of rapport, connecting requires only that you listen to your prospect, customer, client, boss, or peer.

You can learn more about building stronger relationships with your prospects and customer in my new book People Buy You – The Real Secret to What Matters Most in Business

Jeb Blount is the CEO of SalesGravy.com, the most visited sales website on the internet. A respected thought leader on sales and sales leadership, he is author of three books, People Buy You: The Real Secret to what Matters Most in Business, Sales Guy’s 7 Rules for Outselling the Recession, and Power Principles. He is the author of more than 100 articles on sales and sales leadership and the host of the top rated Sales Guy Podcast. For more information on Jeb and his new book People Buy You visit www.PeopleBuyYou.com.

by Jeb Blount, Author the the #1 bestseller,  People Buy You: The Real Secret to What Matters Most in Business

We have all heard the cliché that customers most often buy from people they like. And while this is true I believe that there is another more powerful tenet at play. I believe that people really like to buy from people they believe like them.

Sales research has shown that up to 90% of success in selling depends on your skills for establishing an emotional connection with your prospect or customer.  The data also indicates that most salespeople do well in selling to people like themselves (where it is easy to make connection). Top performing sales and business professionals – Master Persuaders – however, have learned how to build relationships with, and sell to, anyone.

What do Master Persuaders know that others don’t?

They understand that, despite what trainers have been teaching for more than thirty years, establishing rapport is more than just asking about a picture on the wall or an object on a desk. They also know that building rapport requires more than charisma and attitude. The highest earning Sales Professionals consistently practice the skills required to connect with people at the emotional level. They go beyond rapport and create connections.

It is a fact that people like, and are more comfortable with people who are like themselves. So it logically follows that the more we are like our prospects and customers, the easier it is to connect with them. But in business it is impractical to only do business with people who you are similar to you.

Master Persuaders employ sincerity, trust, and listening, to get beyond differences to create emotional connections. We have all heard the cliché that customers most often buy from people they like. And while this is true I believe that there is another more powerful tenet at play. I believe that people really like to buy from people they believe like them.

 I’m sure to some this sounds a little strange so think about it this way: One of the most powerful human cravings is the desire to be liked and accepted by others. We want other people to become our friend, respect us, listen to us, show us sympathy, appreciate us and make us feel important. And, when we believe that another person likes us, we reciprocate and return the favor.

What Master Persuaders have learned to do is get beyond rapport and become so sincerely interested in their prospects and customers that they become friends with virtually anyone. This is powerful because when a connection is made at this level, they are virtually guaranteed success in influencing others. 

Five People Buy You Tips for Connecting With People Who Are Not Like You

Strangers Scare Us: There are few things we find as disconcerting as a stranger asking us personal questions. Yet, that is what many salespeople do the first time they meet a new client or prospect. Top Sales Professionals have learned to find common ground on the business level first by asking easy questions their prospects enjoy answering. Once a conversation is established, they then earn the right to get personal and become even more connected.

The Name Game: We have been conditioned since childhood to respond to the sound of our own name. When someone uses our name we instantly become more comfortable. In fact, there is no other word more beautiful to our ears. Master Persuaders recognize that using names strengthens connections and have developed techniques for remembering and using names.

Find and Solve Problems: The fastest way to lose a connection is to start selling. Prospects and customers don’t want to be sold. Selling happens when your mouth-runneth-over with the features and benefits of your product. When you forget about the “sale” and instead focus on listening to your customer and their problems, you earn trust and deepen the emotional connection.

Shut Up and Listen: Listening is the real key to connecting. Listening is the manifestation of empathy. And empathy is simply our ability to stand in another’s shoes and to learn to be like them.  Empathy connects us to other people on the emotional level. Master Persuaders listen deeply, paying close attention to words, tone of voice and body language. They focus their complete and sincere attention on the other person quickly developing a strong connection which often leads to friendship and a profitable business relationship.

Jeb Blount is the CEO of SalesGravy.com, the world’s largest sales career website. A respected thought leader on sales and sales leadership, he is author of three books, People Buy You: The Real Secret to what Matters Most in Business, Sales Guy’s 7 Rules for Outselling the Recession, and Power Principles. He is the author of more than 100 articles on sales and sales leadership and the host of the top rated Sales Guy Podcast. When you buy Jeb’s new book, People Buy You, today, you’ll also receive thousands of dollars worth of bonus gifts from sales growth leaders – learn more at www.PeopleBuyYou.com.